If there’s one thing I want for my daughters, it’s to find boring love. To find a boring man, who will give them a boring life, in a boring house, in a boring town.
Because I’ve been on the other side of boring. And I’ve experienced that fleeting, heart-racing, dramatic “love” before and I know the better of the two.
I’ve known the excitement of the chase; of the what-if’s; of the “does he love me’s?”
I’ve known the sensation of the cliff-hanger boyfriend, who keeps you on your toes. I’ve had the conversations with my girlfriends, overanalyzing a guys behavior; evaluating our odds with someone; contemplating if they’re playing games and whether we should keep playing them.
I’ve tried to justify a guy’s actions, explaining his behavior and convincing other’s that he’s changed.
And although I know that my daughter’s will likely experience these things, too, I hope they ultimately settle on boring.
I hope they realize the prize that is in a boring man’s love; that the movie-style romance is not the goal; That the married man, the player, the bachelor, the “confused” guy- they don’t have enough to offer them.
It’s the one who has been constant who is deserving of their love. It is the one who isn’t worried about what his friends think, how his reputation is affected or how many girls he’s missing out on, who is worth their time.
My sweet girls, pay attention to these things. Because, when a boring guy loves you, you will find a comfort that you’ve never known before. You will never doubt how he feels about you and you will never wonder if he’s telling the truth.
Your conversations with your girlfriends about him, won’t be like trying to solve a puzzle. They won’t be giving you advice or trying to persuade you to leave.
Because at the end of the day, my daughters, the boring love is the love that lasts. The boring man is the one who will be holding your hair back when you’re sick with the flu. The boring man will put your family first, working long hours to provide for your family. The boring man will be happy with a “Netflix and Chill” night that is literally, a Netflix and chill night.
The boring man doesn’t come with excess drama. He doesn’t play games with you, take advantage of you or make you question your sanity. He will change without you having to ask him to because he knows that, in order to keep you, he must be the best possible version of himself.
He will walk into your life, and become the steady hand that you will need. He will go to work, and come home to you every night. He will go to bed early, mow the grass on the weekends, and gaze at your newborn baby with you at 2 o’clock in the morning.
He will be so utterly predictable, and he will be boring.
Find your boring, daughter’s.
And relish in contentment.