Brooke's Stories, Parenting, Relationships

Thank You for Leaving.

       Romans 8-18 *.jpg

In 2012, I paid a lawyer $1500 for my daughter’s biological father to terminate his rights.

That’s right.

I paid $1500 for him to never have to pay child support again.

And I have no regrets.



I was 23 years old, single and had just welcomed my beautiful baby girl into the world, surrounded by my friends and family- everyone but her biological father. Some may think that sounds sad, and I guess in some regard, it was, but when they laid that baby on my chest, sadness was on the other end of the spectrum of what I was feeling.

I knew from the moment that I realized that I was pregnant, that he wouldn’t be involved and I was okay with that. I may have been foolish in my decision to get involved with him, but once I got his number- I was done. There wasn’t even the slightest desire to reconcile.

I knew that he didn’t want a baby. I knew that he wouldn’t want to help, and I was not about to force him to do so. So, I went about my life and pregnancy, and gave birth with my best friend in the delivery room.

When she was a month old, he reached out to me; he told me that she needed a dad- that he wanted to be in her life. I cooperated fully during the entire week that he “wanted to be a dad” and at the end of the week, when he asked me, “What does she need $75 a week for right now, anyway?” I didn’t argue with him.

I cooperated fully when he told me he wanted to sign his rights away the next day.

The decision to do so, was met with some opposition from my family, and understandably so. As a young, single mom, was it really in the best interest for my baby?

I thought so.

My gut thought so.

My heart thought so.

The court system thought so, too.

To me, being a parent is black and white. You’re either in, or you’re out. You do not get to stand in the doorway. You do not get to be flaky or unreliable or indecisive. You do not put yourself or a new love interest first. You do not compare dollars to the worthiness of being a father.

I told myself that, if he can make the decision to walk away, with no hesitation, then I will let him. It was always my argument that if he was capable of signing those papers, then he did not need to be in my daughter’s life.

After he signed, he had 20 days to change his mind. And he didn’t.

I took a leap of faith when I signed those papers.

I made a promise to her that I would do better; that I wouldn’t be the gullible pushover that I had previously become; that I would take on the role as both mom and dad, in hopes that, someday, someone amazing would come along.

Because he was simply not good enough for her.

My daughter deserves better.

My daughter deserves a father who wants to be in her life; a father who doesn’t mind spending his money on her; a father who will show her what it means to be a man and how a man treats someone he loves.

And because you walked away, she got that and so much more.

She got a father who chose to love her as his own; A father who paid $1500 to adopt her, so that she would grow up with the same last name as our other children; A father who plays with her, buys her 4-wheelers and dirt bikes; A father who gave her his last name, lots of his hard-earned dollars and even more of his time.

This summer, he taught her how to ride a bike and a 4-wheeler and he taught her all about our garden. Every morning, they would go out and pick the garden together. She was so delighted to show me their haul every day.


Her daddy is a funny, 6’8 jungle gym. She loves for him to pick her up and let her touch the ceiling. It’s not unusual for me to find her tucked away on top of our kitchen cabinets “hiding” after daddy gave her a boost.

I watch them play. I watch her laugh. I watch her as she’s inherited some of his mannerisms and it makes my heart so full, because this is not a sad story.

It’s a story about having faith; it’s a story about trusting God; it’s a story about finding, “the one.”

“Whose girl are you?” He’ll say.

And she always responds with, “Daddy’s!!!”

And that, my friends, sits well with my soul.

Adoption Day!
Adoption Day | 08.16.16

53 thoughts on “Thank You for Leaving.

  1. Love this! My girls father is “part” of their lives but he is in no way a involved daddy. My boyfriend treats them more like his own children then thier biological father does. Seeing him with them everyday is all I need to make my heart happy.

    1. It didn’t even take my sons father money to terminate his rights! just the promise I will not collect child support and he ran as fast as he could away from his son! his son is now 33 and wants nothing to do with his deadbeat dad…..but he is a wonderful Dad to his 8 year old daughter!

      1. The exact same thing happened with my daughters “father”. People look at me and act as if I’m some kind of monster, but those who know him know that he is the monster. Best decision I ever made#

    2. Unfortunately, my daughter’s father waited until she was 15 years old to ask to terminate his rights. I wanted to let him so badly, but a wise person said that if she were younger, it would be ok… but now that she is 15, it’s not. Because if I let him sign over his rights, it was teaching her that it was “ok” to walk away from responsibilities. I haven’t collected child support as of yet. We are waiting on the State to complete that. He has blocked both her and myself and broken her heart in a million shattered pieces. She recently stopped asking me “why”. I’m sure it will come up again, but I pray every day that this reaches her the difference between a good relationship and a bad one.

      1. My ex husband decided to sign off his rights when my daughter was 13. It was for sure hard on her as he was very involved in her life until she was 11. But I am thankful he signed off his rights , it gave us a normal life, she now has a dad who loves her and would never leave, and our family is complete.

      2. My oldest daughter went through the same with her father and I came into her and her mothers life when she was five but I have made it my goal in life to show her how a real father should treat his daughter and have always tried to treat her the same as her sister which is my daughter by me and their mother now the oldest is 18 and successfully going through neonatal nursing school and introduces me as dad to everyone not her stepdad my wife and both daughters are my life and couldn’t imagine giving either up I think all women who are strong enough to move on and raise their children on their own and give them the best life possible and heroes you are a good mother

    3. Absolutely LOVE this!! As a mother I felt you made the best decision you could have , being a young mom is hard , being a single young mother is even harder! This is one of happiest story’s I’ve ever read. Thank you! ❤

  2. This is exactly what I want for my son. His father is 1,800 miles away and I don’t know if he’ll ever be ready to be a dad. I know I’ll meet someone who is willing to fill those shoes.

  3. I just have to tell you your story is IDENTICAL to mine!! My daughter is so much better off now! My husband came into our lives when she was 5 months old, and he was hooked from day one! It makes my heart happy that he never saw her as someone else’s child. She is our little diva, along with her sourpatch brother!!! I enjoy reading and watching your stuff!! Keep doin you!!

  4. I LOVE this post! I, too, was adopted by my dad when my parents got married when I was 9-years-old & I will forever be grateful. I have never had any desire to meet my biological dad since I last saw him in 1994 and I feel like I, nor my kids, have missed out. MY dad is amazing & he’s always pushed me & helped shape me into who I am today. And my kids have an amazing Papa that worships the ground they walk on.

    So happy you found happiness and you and your girl’s happily ever after ❤️

  5. Same here. My son was adopted by his Father (my husband) & never questioned it. He knew the truth (he had a biological parent) and understood (as much as a small child can) then just as much as he does now. He knows the one who chose to love him.

  6. This… This is what I should have done! Thank you for your story and thank you for being a woman who I can look up to.

  7. Brooke,
    This touches my heart in such a profound way. I made the decision to “take” my children’s bio dads rights away when he became a danger to them. Was it hard? Yes! Was it expensive? Yes! Was I criticized for it? Yes! Was it the right thing to do?? Yes! Was it worth it? Hell YES! I waited 10 years for Mr. Right so my kids are older but they love their new daddy, friend, and life coach!
    But above all that.. My kids were protected! If I had been killed in a car crash or something.. He wouldnt have gotten my babies! They would have been safe with family that helped raise them and love them.. Not a stranger that shares some DNA..
    I watch everyone of your hilarious videos and can’t wait for more.. But this one.. This one hit me right in the feeler!!! God Bless you and your beautiful family!!

  8. Oh, my heart! My oldest was adopted by my husband in June this year. I also paid to give her a better life — paid for the divorce because he refused to get help, paid for the changes in custody each time they happened, paid for him to give up his rights. He went years saying child support was just “bribery”…& I let him, because I knew one day it would play in mine & my daughter’s favor to allow him to show his true colors. She’s too young to understand, but I hope one day she understands & is thankful for what has happened & her REAL daddy.

  9. Another one of God’s miracle stories. Love the boldness you have! Your children are blessed to have you and him! He’s a hero!

  10. Same story here! My daughter is now 15. Adopted by my husband when she was 9 after years of trying to get her bio father to sign. He’s only seen her 3 times her whole life and never had anything to do with her. Met my husband when she was 2 and she never questioned his role in our life as her dad. We’ve been married 13 years now and she’s still his princess. She knows about but doesn’t want a relationship with her bio father. She told us she has a daddy. So glad we were blessed with him when we were. We also have a son together and two older daughter’s from his first marriage that I raised as my own. Good for you and yours and I wish everyone could take this leap of faith when this situation is at hand. There are still good men (& women) out there who will step up when the bio parents don’t. No one should be criticized for making the right choices for their children. Even if it isn’t the norm…
    God Bless you and your family! Thank you for sharing. It’s good to know others have had a happy ending too.

  11. This is an amazing story! I have one that is identical literally but I have 2 girls. My husband has been their only daddy since they were 2 years old and 5 months old. He is tje most amazing man. Never questioned them from day 1. They share our last name. He taught our youngest to walk, talk and tie her shoes. He helps with homework, celebrates birthdays, changed diapers, hugged them when they were sick or hurt. The biological father walking away was hard at first but when I accepted it for what it was..God gave us something better in return! A real man, the perfect father and a happy healthy family! I love hearing other stories like mine! Thank you for sharing

  12. That’s so amazing I was mother and father to my two kids,my daughters dad had something to do with her,till he remarried then he never talked to sons dad died before he was born God bless you and yours

  13. Ugh. I wish we could get our girls’ mom to give up her rights. She plays favorites so obviously and lives vicariously through them. She’s verbally and has been physically abusive in the past. I wish we had documentation of it, it would have been a done deal. If we had enough money, she’d take it and run, because that’s all she cares about. She’s a horrible person. There’s so much more I could say. I just know that they would be able to thrive and grow here, with their dad and I.

    1. I appreciate that you commented with this perspective! I think as women we often forget that things happen equally in regards to dealing with a bad “other parent” and that “parent” should be used instead of “mothers” or “fathers”.

      Often times, pointing out crappy situations based on fathers or mothers only perpetuates gender based stereotypes and children need parents, plural. Gender is irrelevant. 🙂

  14. I think this is an awesome story. And I admire anyone that steps up when another steps down. I also think if that person has family that wants to be part of the child’s life and has helped and willing to do anything for the child and loves them unconditionally they should be accepted

  15. I married a woman that had a daughter by a previous relationship. The biological father was a
    piece of work. He denied being the father, would stop her on the street and call her names and
    was an all around jerk. I invited him to change and told him the consequences with him not
    complying with my suggestions. He left them alone. When I asked her to marry me, I knew it
    was a package deal – I adopted her shortly after her mother and I married I have done my best to be the daddy she needed in her life.

    We always told her that I had adopted her and she knew her biological father was. They never
    had any contact all those years. A few years back she decided she needed to make contact
    with him but he would not have anything to do with her. It was hurtful to her and I was there
    to comfort her and help her work through the pain of rejection.

    Today she 37 years old, I have not regretted for 1 moment the decision I made so many years ago. We have had our differences but it we’ve always seemed to work things out. In fact I am
    quite involved in her life today. She has made me so proud with her achievements in life. She
    definitely is my “Baby Girl”.

  16. You made me cry with this story. It isn’t any harder for us to leave the wrong daddy behind than it was for them to do the leaving. I love your new life. I love her new daddy. I’m so happy for all of the mom’s that make the decision to not be “tied” to the wrong dad for a few “dollars” a month. Yes, the money would help, but the cost of sending your child to forcefully visit a selfish father is far more costly. They will need counselling to regain the value that you try to instill in them when he won’t spend “his money on them, because he already paid “that woman.”

  17. So happy that it worked out for you. Everyone doesn’t realize that the only thing that matters is that baby. My grandsons dad hasn’t seen him in over 4 months, but because he sends a text every couple of weeks, (according to our lawyer) he is making an effort. B.S.. I can only pray that things work out.

  18. My older sister has a different biological dad than myself and our younger sister. Our dad legally adopted her when she was 5. He’d been in her life since she was 2. He was and still is the person she calls “Daddy”. She stood between our parents on their wedding day, when our dad promised to love and cherish her and our mom for the rest of his life. He did just that! He passed away 4 years and 5 days after our parents wedding. He showed her what a good man was and how a real man was supposed to treat his wife and kids. Now she’s married to a good man and they’re raising their son to be a good man.

  19. I am 60 years old. When I was 10 years old I watched my “daddy” cry because he and my mom could not afford for him to adopt me. I never remembered seeing my biological father, because he chose to not see me.
    That day was the day my “daddy” became my Father in every sense of the word, in my heart. He loved me more than anyone else ever did. And he loved his grandchildren more than he loved me. Only God loved us more because he gave me my Dad.♡

  20. This is what happened to me with the exception of the fact that we couldn’t find bio dad. So, we did the ad in the paper. No response and she was adopted. My husband has been her dad for 20 years now and I regret nothing!

  21. I had almost the exact same story that you had. I’m glad you got your happy ending!!!!!! My husband adopted my daughter almost 2 years ago and it was the best decisions ever! My daughter knows that she was created with someone else but understands that her dad is her dad.

  22. I have been blessed to have both worlds.. my kids biological father is a HUGE part of their lives and we live close and get along really well.. but also have my partner as well.. it seems werid to others that two parents that are split and thier new partners get along.. I make it very clear their dad is in their life and always will be need to get use to it or there is no point in going futher.. So my partner treats them has his own and gets along with their dad. It works for us and the kids are really happy.

  23. This same thing happened to my daughter. Her biological father turned into a drug addict and left. I spent the next 3 years being mom and Dad. just before she turned 4 I got married and my husband said “that’s my baby and I’ll have it no other way” he spent 1800 to take her bio fathers rights and another 1500 to adopt her. She’s 15 and her biological father called wanting to see her… she said “tell him he’s not my father and not to call again” I said I can’t do that you need to. Cause I wanted her to make sure that’s what she wanted. She called him up about a week later after thinking about it and told him not to call again.

  24. I’m going through a situation right now where my son’s father has made it clear that we are not a priority, and we never will be. I have been feeling so alone – thank you for your story and the hope. I was told the only way I can get him to terminate his rights would be if I got married and he was adopted. I’m still researching, and praying a lot. Thank you again.

  25. A friend of mine became a daddy to a little girl not his own at the age of 23/24 two years later his partner and him had another child a little boy and even now 10 yrs later despite the fact that he and their Mum are no longer together he is still her father despite what her birth certificate may say and makes sure he spends as much time with her and her brother as he can but that they also spend time with their young siblings 1 1/2 and 3 (his to a different partner) when ever he can. The love he has for her is no different to the love he has for the other 3.

  26. They don’t all turn out this way. My husband adopted my daughter. We stayed married for 12 years and divorced. He remarried 2 years ago and hasn’t spoken to our daughter since. I will never understand how a man could love a child so much and adopt them just to walk away because he remarries.

    1. He never truly loved her to begin with if he could do that! My husband’s cousin was introduced to his coworker right after she had her second child. The child’s father came to the hospital long enough to see what he looked like, and then moved another woman into their home, turned off her cellphone, and took her car (he co-signed for her because she didnt have good enough credit but she put the down payment and made the notes) before her and baby could even leave the hospital! Yea he was a real winner! The guy we introduced her to tell in love with that little boy from day one along with her other little boy! She fell in-love with his little girl! The bio father of that new baby not signed his rights over right away because he didn’t want to pay child support! All that baby boy knew was the guy we introduced her to. As soon as they got married he adopted that baby boy as his own and she adopted his daughter as her own because the mama of his little girl lost her rights to her. That baby boy is about 4 years old now, and about a year ago they were having major problems coming close to divorce. First thing he said was that is my son, and no matter if we divorce or not we will have equal custody rights with him whether you want to have the same with my daughter or not still! Anybody who could adopt a child in a marriage and then want nothing to do with them out of the marriage never loved that child to begin with! That would be just like adopting a child through an adoption agency if you and your spouse can’t have children, and you adopt a child together to get a divorce later just for you to decide you want nothing to do with that child later own after the divorce! So sorry this happened to you and your precious child!

  27. A story of a real man, and the courageous,God fearing, selfless woman who walked in faith, trusting the Lord, to light her path.

  28. It’s a real shame the law in Australia doesn’t permit this. The biological dad would have to be dead, before they even CONSIDER adoption. Even then it’s unlikely. My husband has loved his daughter more than life itself for 5 years, and is the most amazing father. Yet a man that has only seen her a couple of times as a baby (she’s now 9 yrs) has more rights than my husband does. More rights than the man that loves her, takes her to school, makes her breakfast, helps her with her homework and plays soccer with her. The man that will one day walk her down the aisle.

  29. Right in the feels! I left my daughter’s father when I was 3 months pregnant, because I knew he was worthless and would hold me back in life and my baby deserved better than that! She saved my life and gave me the kick in the butt I needed to get my life together and be someone that she can be proud to call her mom! I tried for the first few months of her life to convince him to be involved, but I got tired of begging him to see her or watch her while I worked extra jobs and finished school. I finally told him (and his mother) that I wasn’t going to be asking anymore, they were welcome to see her whenever they wanted, all they had to do was ask. About a month later we met my now husband (my daughter was 11 months old) and he was hooked from day 1. She was his girl, and he was her daddy. We never heard from “sperm donor” or his family again. He never missed a single child support payment, but only because Ohio can suspend your driver’s license for unpaid child support and he cherished his 7 vehicles more than life itself (and the state automatically deducts it straight from his paycheck before he ever sees it).

    Once I finished my bachelor’s degree and got a full-time job, we contemplated taking him back to court to reevaluate child support (because he would have been paying more than twice as much as he had been). We decided not to, because even though he was paying child support, Ohio Law says if he hasn’t attempted “minimum” contact in the year prior to filing for adoption, we didn’t need his consent. We didn’t want to give him a reason to reach out (even if it was just to throw some expletives our way) until we met all the legal requirements for my husband to file for a step-parent adoption and the sperm donor couldn’t screw that up.

    We couldn’t really afford an attorney, so we did a lot of research and attended a few free legal clinics and was able to get the information we needed to file on our own. My husband was suddenly called to Active Duty in another state, so we had to put off the filing until he was home since he had to be present at the hearing. I was then diagnosed with a chronic health condition that could potentially become serious, so it became all the more important and pressing to get the adoption finalized so that if something happened to me she wouldn’t be ripped away from her father and her brothers to go live with a man she didn’t know. My husband and I had a deal that if something happened before everything was finalized and they tried to take her, he was taking the kids and running. As a Marine, and as a Law Enforcement Officer, he loved his daughter so much that he was willing to become a fugitive if that meant he wouldn’t lose her. Thankfully none of that happened (ha!) and he became her Forever Daddy 4 days before she turned 7. He is the one that takes her to soccer practice everyday, he is the one that tucks her in every night, he is the one she cries for when she’s hurt or sick. We also have 2 boys together, and we’ve talked off and on about having another baby and when I said “don’t you wanna try one more time for a baby girl?” his response was “I already have my baby girl.” And no one can ever take that away from him.

  30. We serve an awesome God. Any man can be a sperm donor but it takes a real special man to be a daddy. My children were thrilled when there step dad-real dad came int o there lives and they were so happy to have all the love and riding bikes and go-karts and all, he could not of loved my children any more then if he had his own.

  31. Your story is so similar to mine. Once I married my amazing husband we paid for “his” rights to be taken away and for my husband to adopt my son. To this day his bio dad has never seen him…ever! And that’s ok cause he has a dad who loves him and will always be there for him!

  32. My daughter did the same thing, paid for him to give up parental rights. He was in no way involved in my beautiful grandson’s life anyway. The father he has paid to adopt him. He has been there for my daughter and baby boy, who is now 18 years old. I couldn’t be more proud!

  33. Love this! My daughter too was adopted by my husband. He started raising her when she was 7, from the moment we started dating he saw my daughter has his too, he never saw her any other way. My daughters bio father was in prison for 8 years, during that time I kept in contact by mailing letters on my daughter’s behalf thinking he wanted to be part of her life, but mistake. When he got out when she was 14 he acted like he wanted a relationship with her but didn’t, he was just talking to her because he thought I would leave my husband for him. After only a month of very little communication with my daughter, he went off on her calling her disgusting names and said he wanted to give up his rights. The next day I contacted a lawyer, got a personal loan and started termination of parental rights. Luckily it only took 3 months the whole process to get done. My ex was worried he would have to pay child support and the state said he would have to pay everything from the day we got divorced when she was 6 to 14 which was over $19,000. I told him I would forgive all but the cost of the adoption, so he agreed and signed, so my idiot ex sold my daughter away. My husband stood proudly in court adopting our daughter on August 5, 2014. One thing I regret is allowing myself to believe he would step up and be a father and had kept contact for years, I should have terminated his rights when my daughter was 7. She’s 18 now and happy with the decisions I made for her.

  34. I suspect I’m much older than the writer here, so I comment with what I hope is taken as an elders respectful wisdom. I’m sure you feel like you made the right choice. And I’m sure your new husband is amazing to your daughter. I hope you prayed very, very, hard before you agreed to the parental termination. It did require both parties consent, so you did have a choice. Unfortunately, No matter what decision you two made, your daughter will never, and I mean never, stop yearning for a connection with her biological father. Even the best of surrogates, a million times more the man than her bio dad is, can’t replace a little girls desire for that bond and love. You didn’t mention that he was a danger to her physically, but more in an emotional way. If he came back tomorrow and wanted to make it right, would you allow that? For your daughter? Could you set aside the resentment to afford your daughter that opportunity? Because boys can eventually turn into men, and my sons father didn’t get it right until our boy was 9. I fought it. But I was wrong. I finally set it all aside, and the cold reality is my son needed to know he was loved by his Dad. We are so lucky to have been forgiven for our sins, and I hope you could also share forgiveness with others, even when they don’t deserve it. May God bless you.

  35. I love this! My daughter is 4 and her dad hasn’t seen her in over 6 months. After I left and we got a divorce he chose to do meth and other drugs and have my daughter subject to that environment. I changed visitation to supervised visits and he hasn’t even tried. He was ordered to have 4 clean consecutive UAs and take a drug and alcohol evaluation in order to get his visitation back. It’s been a year and since then he’s been arrested for meth and pills. I talked to my lawyer about taking rights away and he said typically judges where I live won’t do that.

  36. I thought i was alone in deciding to kick a father out of their childs life for the best interest of the child. I saw how he was part time to his 1st child and the promises he never kept, how he always struggled to go see her and give up when he didnt have a way to get to her, but walked and planned rides for others. Years later we found out i was expecting, a baby with a man who got violant and threw fits when he did not get his way, a man who had no job and was content with the nothing he had but loved to make others feel bad and give him handouts, a man who even before our daughter was born gave me a list of things i could not do with our child, like going to my mothers, he would say that my own mother couldnt give her kisses because who knows where her mouth had been. My mother who waited for my father to give her self in front of God. I was so sick of him and all his madness, i gave him a chance because its what he wanted, but after complaining that he couldn’t afford diapers because he didnt have money, but was out buying hats and shoes for him and his new girlfriend and taking her shopping etc. I was drained and depressed and i knew i didnt want the same for my daughter, so i kick him out of our lives, i could not stomach the idea of all the ignorance he and his family would teach my angel. I didnt want to let it happen so i told him to go away, simple enough he did. Shes 5 now and hes contact me over FB like once or twice, his girlfriends contacted me more than he did about letting him see our daughter.i always kinda laughted it off, why would i need a man whos in and out of jail into our Peace. We do not need part time people in our lives with so much nativity, ignorance and hate. Till this day ive never regretted kicking him out.

  37. Thank you for writing this! I loved it!
    My son’s DNA provider, WAS in the delivery room, he played the part very well for a week. I was getting $120 a month in child support until that was too much. He took me back for a review and found he changed jobs, more pay, more hours, better OT hours and pay…raised it the then $300 a month. He was not happy about that. To me it wasn’t about the money, I’d rather him spend some time with my son. He refused, but would pick up his other 2 children from his previous wife on time, every time, never missed a beat. I didn’t force the issue, it’s not my place to make him own up to his responsibilities. When my son was 3 he wanted to take him, to my son a stranger, I refused and said I will be there to monitor and so my son feels comfortable. Baby steps since he didn’t know who the heck this guy is, a complete stranger. He then refused, called me every name in the book. He tried to trick me to drop off my son with him and then meet them at a location….uh wrong!! I said just leave us alone already, give up your rights. He said if you pay for a lawyer AND stop child support “I’ll sign the papers without a fight.” I said DONE!! $1500 for a lawyer to terminate rights and child support, $350 for another lawyer to have my son’s last name changed to mine, $30 to send the paperwork to Texas Bureau of Vital Statistics. Having MY son = priceless!
    Yes my son asks questions and sometimes it’s hard, but I wouldn’t change us for anything. Better is out there!!

  38. the state of pennsylvania would not allow me to…(lawyers terminology) bastardize my child. i had to have someone agree to adopt her before bios rights could be terminated. it all had to be done on the same day.

  39. This made me smile! I had my first son when I was 16. His father was in and out all the time. For a few months he would come around then disappear. He wouldn’t contact me because his girlfriend said so. And he would go weeks without seeing him. He even went as far as to have mt son memorize his number and them change it….3 years ago when my son was 6 he completely stopped all contact. The only explanation was he was to busy.. he had a new daughter by then. IMY boyfriend (now husband) had to watch as my son who was old enough to under stand l, cry and ask why his dad didn’t love him like my nd lived his daughter. It took 3 years but I finally got up the nerve to ask him to sign over his rights when my son at 8 yeats old asked my husband to adopt him shortly after our wedding. He was thrilled and agreed and started paper work. And as of 12.20.17 my little boy got the daddy he deserved.

  40. When does the pain stop? My son’s father is doing the in and out thing right now and I just want to let go and stop hurting. I don’t ever want my son to know that his dad doesn’t make time for him.

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